I miss Sunday lunches at my grandmother’s house. I used to go every fortnight to visit her and meet my father’s side of the family. We weren’t really close, but that was the time when we would sit together, around the table, and talk. After lunch, just before we would go back home and begin our week, she would call each grandchild and bless us. I can still remember the energy that I felt running through my body, as she blessed me. After so many years, I can still feel her blessing in me.
A blessing can be given by someone to another, like my grandmother used to do, but it can also be the recognition of something special, an expression of gratitude or a wish. Blessings come in different forms to our lives.
Rabbi Meir, husband of Bruria, and a talmudic sage from the land of Israel, used to teach that a person should recite one hundred blessings every day[i]. Based on this teaching, Jewish tradition developed a multitude of blessings which can be recited in different occasions during the day. Since those which express gratitude for life, health, soul, intelligence, until other less known ones like a blessing upon meeting a sage, upon sighting a rainbow or upon smelling a fragrant flower.
It is not difficult to find simple (and more complex) reasons for blessings in our daily lives: it’s spring – streets and parks are coloured by different flowers; the weather is beautiful today; this is my third week here at the Ark this month! We are grateful for friends, for the life of those who were part of our lives.
Rabbi Dr. Dalia Marx teaches that blessings provide the person who recites it a sense of grounding and control, accompanying the person until they reach a place of stability and security. Especially the ones formulated according to the liturgical rule of giving thanks for the past and crying out for the future.[ii]
The benefits that reciting blessings or practicing gratitude can do to our mental, emotional, and even physical well-being is proven by scientific studies. There is evidence to suggest that being thankful and expressing gratitude can lead to better sleep quality, reduce stress, strengthen the immune system, improve blood pressure and even reduce inflammation. Saying blessings has been linked to a reduction in symptoms of depression and anxiety. Focusing on the positive aspects of one’s life and acknowledging the things one is thankful for can help shift their mindset away from negativity, increasing feelings of happiness and life satisfaction, and improve overall mental well-being. "Counting your blessings" can lead to improved health and help one cope with challenges.
Since the beginning of my rabbinic studies, 6 years ago, I adopted two Jewish mindfulness practices, which I share in my social media accounts: the counting of the Omer and meditations for Elul. This year, as part of my personal practice during this Omer period I have been counting blessings. I have been revisiting blessings that I know, getting to know others that I didn’t, and rewriting them. Every day I choose a blessing and reflect about it and its impact in my life. And in this path of counting the days and connecting them to traditional Jewish blessings, I am connecting to myself in a mindful way. I am preparing my body and soul from Pessach to Shavuot, from freedom to Torah.
By looking for unknown and known prayers I connect with the past, with the Jewish tradition. By rewriting them I can make the changes that are necessary for me to say exactly what I need. For instance, the prayers I write are all to a female God. Also, I adapt the original wording to similar ones that reflect my values and thoughts.
Although prayers are usually God oriented: we thank God for the past, recognise God for the present, ask God for the future; did you ever looked back and thanked your old self for the choices you made? “Whether thanking your past self for a wise decision, a courageous move, doing what you had to do to survive a difficult time? Appreciating what you did in the past is a powerful way of integrating your past experiences and boosting your self-esteem.”[iii] Have you ever considered blessing yourself, looking back and acknowledging your decisions, seeing yourself today, and wishing for your future?
Science proves that Rabbi Meir was right, that we should see life with different lenses, counting our several blessings during the day. My grandmother was also right: we should spread blessings around us, especially to those we love. We should also remember to bless ourselves, thank ourselves and acknowledge who we are and what we do. For all this, we need blessings that reflect who we are and what we really want to say. We need to write and be our own blessings, so that we can be and give blessings to others.
May we be able to recognise and say blessings. May we be who we are, and may we be blessed in all that we are.[iv]
Shabbat Shalom
[i] TB Menachot 43b
[ii] Marx , Dalia . “The Morning Ritual (Birkhot Hashahar) in the Talmud: The Reconstitution of One’s Body and Personal Identity through the Blessings.” Www.academia.edu, vol. LXXVII, 2006, www.academia.edu/4877753/The_Morning_Ritual_Birkhot_Hashahar_in_the_Talmud_The_Reconstitution_of_One_s_Body_and_Personal_Identity_through_the_Blessings. Accessed 29 May 2024.
[iii] Debbie Danon
[iv] Blessing for Children by Marcia Falk